You Can’t Control Everything (And That’s Okay)
Author: Greg
May 13, 2025
Behind the Madness of a Double Birthday, a Renovation, and a Life Lesson
Let me paint you a picture. It’s May 10th, 2025 – party time! My daughter Aleesia is turning 4. I just turned 50. And we decided to throw one heck of a party to celebrate both milestones. But this wasn’t your average backyard bash. This was a full-blown, multi-layered, 100-person pool-party blowout with ponies, mariachi, open bar, carne asada for days, fireworks, and a DJ (that didn’t show)!
It was also the culmination of 18 months of blood, sweat, blueprints, and busted deadlines.
See, for the past year and a half, my wife and I have been in renovation mode on our newest 4-acre property. We didn’t just add a pool. We wanted to built a resort-style oasis. New casita. Massive outdoor kitchen. A hand-built carne asada table. A charcoal pizza oven. Ramadas. Landscaping. A dirt road to access the build site. Speakers, lighting, turf, trees, plumbing, wiring, Wi-Fi… The list goes on.
But here’s the truth: No matter how hard you try to control it all, you can’t. And this party reminded me of that. Hard.
The Illusion of Control
I tried. Believe me, I tried. I held meetings with every construction crew. I laid out the timelines. I gave many of them a hard deadline of April 18. I coordinated the pool company, casita builder, kitchen crews, and landscapers. I planned for margin. I literally told them: “You can be the heroes of this party, or the reason people don’t have a place to swim, cook, or sleep.”
We laughed. But I wasn’t joking.
I ran around like a foreman. Some days there were 13-15 work trucks on property mixed with Amazon deliveries. Costco drop-offs. Home Depot runs. Coordinating everything from gas lines to septic tanks to Wi-Fi extenders. I’d be doing zooms inside and then run outside in my work boots to ensure things were progressing.
And still…
None of the companies hit the deadline.
Except the casita team. God bless ’em.
The Day of the Party
May 10th rolls around. There are still guys on the roof finishing the Ramada as guests arrive. A windstorm knocks over our balloon arch—almost taking out my daughter’s preschool teacher. The jump house company messed up the order. We had no power in the kitchen because the crew forgot to finalize the wiring. And I was frantically wiring Cat6 cable outside so we could have wifi to power the music at the pool. Oh, and there was a huge event down the road that shut down traffic in every direction so people who could usually get to our home in 5 minutes were taking 35 minutes. It felt like total chaos for me.
Meanwhile, friends and family were arriving from Mexico, from Canada, from across the country. People were laughing. Kids were playing. Ponies were being ridden. Mariachis were killing it. And I barely noticed.
Why?
Because I was too busy stressing over details like unfinished stone on the outdoor fireplace.
Letting Go of the Wrong Things
I was so focused on making everything perfect that I forgot to enjoy what actually mattered.
Aleesia didn’t care if the fireplace had the natural stone on it. She cared that her friends were there. That she could jump in the pool. That there were animals to play with and music to dance to.
And honestly? That should have been enough for me too.
But I had to learn (again) that control is often an illusion. Especially when you’re building big things.
Whether it’s a business, a brand, a property, or a birthday… things will go wrong. People will drop the ball. Timelines will slip. Weather will act up. And in the middle of that chaos, you get to choose how you respond.
The Real Success Wasn’t the Build
Looking back, here’s what I’ll remember:
- My daughter beaming with joy on her fourth birthday.
- My mom and my mother-in-law both together, both making the trip to be with us.
- The people who showed up. The support. The love.
I won’t remember the tile that didn’t get laid.
And neither will anyone else.
So here’s the takeaway I’ll leave you with:
Control what you can. Lead with intention. But don’t let your expectations rob you of the joy that’s already happening.
Because legacy isn’t built in perfect conditions. It’s built in the messy middle.
And damn it… sometimes the party goes off just fine without the speakers hooked up.
That’s the real win.
-Greg
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